Farm JamJod, was once a pig farm, now in the transitions into a new space, this place takes me back to childhood memories tied to the relationships between plants, animals, and food.
       For me, food constructs identity through memories, flavors, and emotions born from shared experiences. It also acts as a conversation, allowing me to perceive the experiences of others through taste. Farm JamJod, which was once a large pig farm filled with animal feed, sacks of fertilizer, the smell of rice bran, and the lingering scent of pigs brings me back to my childhood, especially the feelings toward animals raised to become human food.
            I grew up in a vegetarian family, taught that eating meat was a sin and refraining from it was a way of not harming animals. My food choices were never truly my own. I still remember the feeling as a child of wanting to eat meatballs sold in front of the school but not being able to. Only at the age of 28 did I gradually start eating meat by my own decision, and eventually more seriously. This shift came with complex emotions: the awareness of lives behind the food on my plate, while still choosing to eat meat. Such ambiguity embodies what is known as the Meat Paradox a psychological state where humans consume meat yet cannot face the image of animals being killed, feeling guilt toward those living beings.
         Because of being vegetarian since childhood, I also missed experiencing many local dishes, such as Trey Hoh (fermented fish), Bo Dong (roasted coconut chili paste), Slao Angkan (Siamese Senna curry), Samlor Jek  (banana curry), or Samlor Try Ma’om (fish curry with herbs) all of which contain meat. This absence became the starting point of this work.
         Meet Paradox (2025) is a process of revisiting conversations with elders in the village about the flavors of foods they used to make, as well as the vegetables and ingredients once used to feed pigs. I think of these methods while blending them with vegetarian dishes from my own memories. I also revisited “Pathom Asoke” in Nakhon Pathom, a spiritual practice community and vegetarian food hub I had known since childhood, to gather ingredients and tools.
      I then experimented with creating new foods, fermenting vegetables collected around Farm JamJod with rice bran and toasted rice, in a process similar to making fermented fish, paired with peanut dipping sauce from my home recipe. The process was documented through both moving images and cooking itself.
For me, every step harvesting, washing, blanching, boiling vegetables, to slowly massaging rice bran for fermentation brought me back to my childhood experiences, while simultaneously constructing my present identity anew. These are the things I want to convey, inviting audiences to sense and imagine through their own experiences with this work.